The boys are back.....

The fiber boys that is..........

My neighbor next door is totally "hooked" up with phone and t.v. and everything.  They wanted to schedule me but I was on my way up North so now they will connect me on the 20th....just in time for football!  The first pre-season game is tonight but I'll probably listen to it on the radio.  I will be paying the same price for fiber, unlimited long distance any time and the lowest t.v. package which is local channels and more than I did for long distance charged by the minute and no t.v.  Both include the internet and fiber will be much faster.  Sweet!  I can't wait!  They came back to install the fiber for another neighbor and it is SO HOT.  Yesterday was 94 but "felt like" 104....those poor guys.
I'm still doing laundry.....I don't think Jim had any clean clothes but he had a lot of them!  Maybe when you have to go to the laundromat you need more clothes on hand.  I'm washing them all and then I'll probably put them in the garage sale this Fall.  He had some nice work clothes...like Carhart and some nice fleece sweatshirts that I might use this Winter.  I've been going though his things each day for a bit....some of it is hard but it has to be done....and paperwork.....that will get burned eventually as much of it has his Social Security Number on it.  I have a shredder but there's just too much of it to shred.  I did find something comforting yesterday........a rosary...we're not Catholic but I think maybe his room mate was and a Pieta Prayer Book which I'm sure Jim remembered the Pieta statue I have had for over 40 years............

  We talked about God but now I feel very comforted that he was praying and I found notes that indicated he was praying for others too............

While I was gone I received some gifts from my daughter and her family.  I've missed a few so there will be more later.............designer Duck Tape (duct tape)

a campfire night light....too cute!

an engraved rock that Amy gave me when it was "getting rough"...........so true although I have been known to say trust in "HER"...........

and the grands gave me some fool's gold.....I hope there wasn't a subliminal message there?

I also discovered some new products........my daughter uses this and I bought some and love it!  I  usually wash my face with soap and although my goat soap that I make is not drying like regular soap, I manage to get my robe wet, my pj's and the whole countertop.........this I use face pads with...no fuss , no muss!  It does not dry out your skin and it is pure.........LOVE!  It's by Garnier and my daughter gets hers at Walgreens and I got mine at Walmart so it is readily available.  Great for makeup removal so it says............

I've also been buying this soap at Walmart which is pure and uses essential oils not chemicals....they have liquid and foaming.  I prefer foaming as it is less messy and doesn't drip all over the sink.  This one is Apricot Vanilla but the one in my kitchen is Spearmint and Lemongrass and I think that is my favorite.............also, save the foaming containers as you can use them to "foam" any of your own soaps or cleaning products.  I make my own upholstery shampoo and it is great for that..........

Okay, I was looking for Goldbond Comfort Powder but then I saw this and I couldn't resist........it comes highly rated on Amazon.........I haven't tried it yet but I have been looking for an anti-chafing powder for the Summer when it is so hot here!  I can't work outside without perspiring and getting rubbed raw in places so I hope this helps!  The older you get the thinner your skin in places so it doesn't take much to get rubbed raw..  It is not talc but corn starch and calamine and maybe something else.  You evidently can't buy it in stores but only online, from what I understand.  I will let you know how I like it...........I ordered mine from Amazon.............

 I had to start my Helix hat over....I can never seem to get off on the right foot at the first try....sometimes it takes me three or more to get going properly but this time was only 2 and I switched to my darkest yarn to start.......I'm almost done with the brim.......

 and here is a picture of my Grace girl who got a shampoo and a haircut while I was gone..........she's so pretty with that hair cut and no matting..........Miss Peeps kept crying at me the first couple days I was home until I finally figured out she was missing her 2 "babies"!  They forget to give them to me when I went to pick her up.  I called and they had them and I picked them up on my way to Walmart the other day.  She was so happy to see them! LOL!  It was hysterical.....they really are her babies!

 That's all for today folks.  I went to the Farmer's Market this morning and now I'm off to bake some bread that's been rising and I need to make a peach cobbler for dessert.  Yesterday I made pork chops and gravy with potatoes and green beans for a vegetable.  It's good to be home and eating my own cooking for a change.   Although I had some mighty good eating at my daughter and SIL's while I was there.
Happy Trails!!!

YOP Week #5

                                                       
If you don't read my blog through the week than you might not know that my son passed away July 24th....thus the reason for my absence on YOP.  I posted about it in the post before this one if you want to read it.  I also had to have my little Annie girl put down while I was up North.  I will have a few updates at the end of this YOP post but for now I will show you what I've gotten accomplished these past weeks.  Which isn't much but I was grateful for the handwork I had with me.  At a time of great stress....handwork is like a "port in a storm".
The only project I took with me was My Granny's Afghan cross stitch.  It was easy to pick up and put down along with some Beatrix Potter mystery books by Susan Wittig Albert which I highly recommend.  Here's my progress so far.....working on square #5 of 39..........

While I was in Iowa my daughter took me to a yarn shop.  I have never been to a real yarn shop and it was amazing!   They also carried wool, needlepoint and cross stitch supplies.  I needed some supplies that I was going to order online but I was able to get everything I needed at the shop. 

  Along with some sock yarn...they are the same color although it doesn't look like it..........so let the sock knitting begin!

With the new needles I was able to start the Helix hats that  I'll be making for Christmas............they are a 'stash buster' project......

I did not keep up with my cross stitch "days" but yesterday I managed to stitch for Stars and Stripes Saturday........I finished the white row and started stitching the white on the red row and then I will stitch the red on the white row..........

I need to get back to my YOP list and ensure I am "on task" but baby steps....

A couple days before I got the phone call about my son, I saw these crows or ravens in my beck yard.  I've never seen them grouped like that and they stayed there for a long time.....now I wonder if it was a 'sign' of things to come.................

Friday was a rough day.  Jim left everything he had to me and I was able to get it all packed in my Tahoe and unloaded it when I got home.  I was going through his things and found the gift he had told me he had for me.............
 a beautiful shawl and card.........I will cherish it forever...........

 He had been hospitalized several times before I knew about it and he didn't want the doctors to tell me until there was no hope and that's when I got the call.  He knew for a long time.........I was blessed to find this gift from him.  Despite his problems I never once doubted he loved me and I hope he never doubted my love for him either...........

 I also found a picture of Jim's dad and I when we were high school sweethearts.  I thought that picture had bit the dust years ago but evidently Jim had it.   We had our senior pictures taken and then one of us together.  It's hard to believe I was ever that young....and no wrinkles! LOL! 

  I also lost my dear little Annie who was the happiest dog ever....while Nitty was the stoic type...Annie was the welcome wagon.  She was full of joy and I hope she is now united with her big sister, Nitty, and Jim who was Nitty's original owner before me. 
Yesterday was good.  My dryer died but it forced me to hang clothes outside on the clothesline that Jim had built for me several years ago.  I mowed the lawn in the morning and being outside was good therapy.  I've always felt that hard work helps a person work out problems or sorrow and makes you so tired that you sleep well regardless.  I came in and took a nice bath, had a nice supper and slept well.  Grief is a slow process and I'm not sure I will ever totally get over it but I also know Jim, Nitty and Annie would not want me to be sad for long.........I'll try not to be but no promises.
I want to thank ALL of you who left comments of love and support.  I cannot tell you how much it meant to me.  You are true friends and I missed you all.  I am so glad to be back and plan on catching up with all of you.

Please stop by here and see all the other beautiful makes from the Year of Projects group.Happy Trails!!!

The hardest post I've ever had to write...

I'm back but carrying my grief with me.  My son passed away on July 24th at 7:15 p.m.  I had been staying at his bedside since I got there except for the first night and one other as Annie was with me but got sick again while I was there.  Annie was at my daughter's house and my grandson Sam who just turned 12 was taking care of her.  He really did an excellent job too and my daughter gave her her meds..  My son was only 38 but had struggled with alcoholism most of his adult life.  He had also contracted hepatitis and was cured but it did it's damage to his liver also.  He was at the University of Iowa hospital in Iowa City who had been caring for him as an outpatient also.  I couldn't talk to him on the phone because he was so weak and miserable but the day before I left I got a phone message from him that he loved me and that was really the last time we talked.  I am so afraid I am going to lose the message on my answering machine.  By the time I got there the next day he wasn't conversing.  He could hear and did say "no" a few times when the nurses tried to get him to take pills but it was an effort.  We continued to talk to him though. I met with his "team" of doctors and he had a lot of them.  There was Family Medicine, liver specialists, Palliative Care and more.   His father arrived the next day and discovered that Jim had named me the one to make the decisions for him if it got to the point where he couldn't.  He didn't like that and let it be known the rest of the week.  They had also talked to Jim about his wishes which they were able to convey to me. That was a godsend because I only wanted to carry out his wishes and no one else's.  After talking with the doctors and realizing there was no hope, all I wanted to do was make him comfortable so we moved him to the hospice floor where he was made comfortable and had no more pills or any invasive procedures.  The nurses and hospice people were so wonderful not only to Jim but to the rest of us.  My "ex" not so much. His whole family is into drama and some of them were enablers of Jim and have drinking  problems themselves.  They were calling constantly and I finally had to block their calls to Jim and bar them from visiting.  Thank God the "ex" did not express a desire to spend the night at the hospital.  When Jim had called him to tell him he was in the hospital he told him "Well, you brought this on yourself."  I won't comment further but he made the whole process even more difficult....it got ugly.
Jim had been resting so peacefully.  He had had one episode where he couldn't get his breath and that was scary for him and for me but they were giving him phentynol and some other intravenous meds which they increased so he would not panic or be in any pain.  They talked to me and gave me booklets on what to expect and I thought I was ready for what was to come but I was not.  He was resting peacefully and they had just turned him and so I ordered some supper.  As I was walking away from the phone by his bed, I saw something out of the corner of my eye and turned to see him flailing around and he was having a seizure.  I ran out in the hall and screamed for the nurse and by the time she came in it was waning and then he was calm and then she said he was gone.  I was in shock....I didn't expect a seizure and I didn't expect him to die from it.  I was devastated......I guess you're never really prepared when it happens.  I was alone and I had the nurse call my daughter as I couldn't even speak.  My daughter said she could hear me in the background and it sounded like a wounded animal and I guess that's what I was.  I kept talking to him through my tears long after he had passed and later my daughter told me that the hospice team said that the brain still processes up to 30 minutes after the body dies.  I hope he heard me.  My baby, my youngest was gone and I'm not sure I will ever get over it but I will "carry on".  Grief is funny, it grabs you at the most unexpected times.  All of a sudden and you can feel it in your heart....like someone is squeezing it.  I guess that is what they mean when they say your heart is breaking. 
I know my son was an alcoholic but he was also a wonderful human being and someone I was very proud of.  He had a heart of gold and would do anything for anyone.  Sometimes I think that the gentle souls of this world have a  tough time dealing with the evils of this world more so than the rest of us thus the need to turn to something that numbs the pain.  He loved animals and was so artistic.  Even when he was young he could draw anything.  On Saturdays, he and I would watch Bob Ross on PBS.  He was also a great cook and I enjoyed many of his wonderful meals. His guacamole was out of this world!  He was a painter, a drywaller and a construction person by trade and gave away so many hours of his labor to people who couldn't afford it.  He did not have a head for business but he had a heart for people.   
While I was there my car broke down....the antifreeze compartment was leaking so I couldn't get it in until Monday, then there was Annie who I took to a wonderful veterinarian there and she seemed like she was getting better but then the next day she was not good at all.  She couldn't stand and could barely lift her head.  I had to have her put down.  After funeral arrangements were taken care of and the car and Annie........I headed home Wednesday.  It's a 10 hour drive and I had nice weather both times.  I am still grateful for no more suffering for those I've loved and lost, for safe journeys, for money to pay for everything and being able "to do all things through Christ who strengthens me".
No one gets through this lifetime without pain and suffering of some kind.....we are all fighting battles of different kinds so when someone cuts you off in traffic or snips at you.....try and remember that they could be in the battle of a lifetime that you don't even know about.....unless it's your "ex" and then "give him hell, Harry!"
P.S.  My dryer just quit....woe is me!  Not really.....it's just a blip on the radar.  I'll be by soon. 

Sabatical

Dear blog friends.........I am going up North....but not the way I wanted to.  My son is ill and not likely to make it from what the doctors say.  I only hope and pray I get there in time.  I will notify you when I return but I will not be leaving his side so I don't know when that will be.  Please keep him in your prayers and me too as I have a 10-12 hours drive ahead of me.  Blessings to all of you.
Sam

YOP Week #2

                                                        I have a finish!  Wow, if I could only keep this up every week! 
Under the section DOILIES:
This was a great pattern.  I always call it a great pattern if I understand it and don't have any trouble with it....lol!  I'll be making more of these.  I used some leftover pink cotton yarn from Rowan.  But per "the rules".  I now have to dig up a doily WIP and finish before any new doily patterns can be made.   I linked to the pattern in last weeks YOP post....Week #1.

I started the baby kimono but the pattern I had chosen was not clear at all and so I searched for another and found one by Joji Locatelli which was a real surprise because I did not know she had any baby patterns.  I trust her patterns as they are always highly rated but this will be the first one I will have made.  Also, it calls for 2 buttons and buttonholes which I have never done,  So, I think I will knit up a practice swatch and follow a You Tube video I found for knitting buttonholes so I know what I'm doing before I attempt it on the kimono.

The rest of my progress has been on my cross stitch..........
Monthly Monday....I've made progress...........

 Witchy Wednesday........

Fall Friday....Tom Turkey...........

 Stars and Stripes Saturday...............

 Not quite finished with the white row..............

 Santa Sunday.............I was gifted several of the Prairie Schooler Santas.  They come out with a new one every  year.

 And for the days in between...................

Sew She Did by Lori Holt at The Fat Quarter Shop.............I'm outlining so that I can do mindless fill in the blanks cross stitch and watch t.v.

 
 Okay.......is this called stash enhancement?  Not sure but I bought a pattern I have wanted to stitch ever since Donna at Stitching in Doo Dah (podcast) made one similar by the same designer, Caroline Manning.  She has loads of gorgeous patterns and so here it is...............

 This is full coverage and there are 39 squares..............I have 1 and 1/2 done...........I can't put it down!
It's like knitting with self-striping yarn.....you want to see what the next color looks like.....the first square I did the border too just like joining in crochet.  This appeals to me on so many levels.  The symmetry, the colors and their placement, no outlining or special stitches and a design that does not require you  to look back at the pattern every 2 seconds....it's pretty evident what the pattern is after a few squares................

Another reason I am so in love with this pattern is that it gives me a zillion different color combinations that so far I really like but would not have come up with on my own.  I will be using this piece as a starting point for many more projects.  She calls it her Granny's Afghan but not sure if it really is but I love it!  She went from the afghan to developing a cross stitch pattern.  I want to take the cross stitch pattern and make a crocheted afghan using those exact same colors.  I'll match the DMC floss colors to yarn!  It's a long way off but I really want to do it.  This piece has given me so much inspiration....thank you Caroline!

There are 2 things I forgot last week.  Connie reminded me...."no socks?".....how could I forget one of my favorites?  There will be a sock category added and some sock yarn ordered.  Plus, I have a few sock books to dig up.  I also forgot to add some of the resources (besides the obvious Ravelry) that I will be utilizing.........

I rarely buy magazines anymore but I have had real good luck with the Holiday issues and I go back to them time and again. 

.......

this Knit Picks book definitely has some practical making in it

I have had this book for years and now that I am back into cross stitch I plan on picking out some projects from it............I do have a lot of cross stitch resources from years ago....books and magazines

 That's all the fiber related projects for this week.  I have worked outside though!  I mowed Monday

 and it was like a hay field....some parts still are.  I let the grass dry out a bit and then used it as mulch in several places around my yard.  I go to Mountain Home next week and hopefully will be able to get mulch there but meanwhile I used what I had............
The little pool would not hold the paint for some reason so it is what it is.....I had to get planting!
 See the grass mulch?  I am hoping it helps keep some moisture in.  I had to get my banana peppers planted.....see...they already have peppers on them!

  spaghetti squash....

Cucumbers (pickling).........

zucchini..........

and a big crop of daisies!

Barry has just arrived....it's raining now and the wind has picked up.  We have flash flood warnings.  Just so the power stays on and my sump pump keeps working! LOL!  What a cozy afternoon and probably the next 3 days to stay in and enjoy homemade pleasures!
Please stop by here and see all the other beautiful makes from the Year of Projects group.
Happy Trails!!!

Just humming along............

I am as busy as a bee in Summer!  Monday I mowed, did some house cleaning and made mango, black bean and corn salsa.  The salsa is good and good for you too.  I didn't take a picture but the recipe is at All Recipes.  I ran uptown to get a few things and called the vet to see if I should keep Annie's yearly appointment for rabies, etc.  She said no as she is pretty much an inside dog now and can't go anywhere without me carrying her down the stairs.  BTW, she's doing okay but I know she had a stroke as she is not the same dog.
I started a couple projects from my YOP list and picked my first cucumbers/pickling cucumbers actually.

Tuesday was garbage day.  I ordered some floss and the Granny's Afghan cross stitch pattern. I have the material already.  This will be a long term project and I will be stitching it on some cream fabric not the blue.

  I had painted the little pool but for some reason it is not sticking and much of it came off.  I may just plant it as is for now.  I'm tired of messing with it and these plants need to be planted or I may use some window boxes I have....we'll see.  I can't find my charger for my "jaws of life" which I call my chain saw scissors.  I'll have to use loppers if I want to keep trimming. I'm watering everyday now as it gets HOT...90's unless it rains.

Yesterday I went to the Farmer's Market here in town.  I was able to get some not quite ripe tomatoes, a zucchini, a sage plant and chives and a dozen eggs.  Plus, the Amish woman that bakes was there and I got a fresh peach cobbler she had made the day before.  Guess what I had for breakfast when I got home?  
I also had some pears I was going to make a tart with but I really didn't feel like rolling out dough and that mess so I thought I would make a pear cobbler.  I looked up recipes as I loved the one I bought.  I don't like the kind where they use oats in it.  Hers was more of a sweet biscuit topping.  I found recipes and an explanation of the difference between  a cobbler, a crisp and a crumble. Now I understand.  Here's the basic difference and I quote from Weaver's Orchard.....

• The streusel topping on a crisp contains oats.
• The streusel topping on a crumble does not contain oats.
• A cobbler features a biscuit topping, giving it a cobbled-road appearance and inspiring the name.
•  

The recipe I used can be found here

It was easy and delicious....qualities I love in baking!

This little guy/gal has a nest nearby as he/she sits on my windowsill and is there all the time or on my clothesline nearby........a  wren?  Can anyone tell me?

 here he is singing his little heart out.........I'm saying "he" because do the females sing?

 I worked on the Button Eyed Cat xs yesterday as it was Witchy Wednesday......he's coming along slowly but surely........

Not much excitement around here except the Barry storm is supposed to bring lots of rain here and winds probably if it continues on it's current track which means I need to get groceries tomorrow and get more yard work done before then.  It's looking like Sunday/Monday time frame but that could all change.  Weather.com exaggerates quite a bit!
I hope you are having a good week and enjoying your summer time!
Happy Trails!!!